Starting a Family

My husband and I had decided to start a family shortly after we got married, because we were both closer to 40 than 30, and didn’t want to wait too long and miss out on the opportunity to have kids together. I think we just assumed it would just happen. Both of us were relatively healthy, so we didn’t think anything of it. But after several months of trying with no success, we realized that the clock was ticking, and it might be time to seek some medical advice.

Full Speed Ahead on the Hot Mess Express

So now that we’ve established that real relationships, even the best ones, aren’t *all* sunshine and unicorns *all* the time, let’s talk real life struggles for a bit. Almost immediately after we got back from our honeymoon, the week before school started, we unexpectedly got my husband’s daughter full-time. I won’t go into all of the story here, or share too many of the details, but let me paint the picture a bit and I’ll let you decide how that went for me.

My Hallmark Story

Our love story was just like a Hallmark movie. Girl returns home to rural USA after ending a bad relationship in the big city… almost immediately meets a nice guy in an old pickup truck wearing old work jeans, flannel shirts, and cowboy boots… oh and he even had baby goats in his kitchen. They hang out innocently while he helps her look for a house to renovate, and he ends up making her fall in love with him. They have a blast becoming best friends, going on romantic dates, and end up starting a life together in his old farmhouse, negating the need for her to buy her own.

I Went to the Bar… A Lot.

When I came back from San Diego, I don’t know what I expected, but I was not prepared for what I got. I was 33 years old, living with my mother in the middle of cornfields, with nothing to do but promote my online network marketing business that I no longer loved (and was no longer thriving).